Hello, I am Abuja, your Capital City

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Hello, I am Abuja, your Capital city. Unlike other places, I have the right to speak to you directly on a one to one basis. I know most of you don’t like me. You think I am not real, that I am an artificial being. You believe that only civil servants and politicians live with me. You say I have no soul. I won’t argue with you, I am Abuja, your capital city and you should take me the way I am.

My cousin Lagos, does not like me. She hates the fact that immediately I was born, power was taken away from her and given to me because our Leader said that I am in a better position to defend and protect the country from any external attack. So I took the power and some influence away from Lagos.

I understand that a lot of people who claim to love me are not sincere. They pretend to love me but behind me, they say a lot of bad things. I get angry and saddened most times. I know I am only a means to an end for them. All the big men that come to me, are here for their selfish purposes. As soon as they get the money, power, contracts, and influence from me, they disappear.

Your hearts are not with me. You people talk about me only because I am the seat of power. I hold power in Nigeria. Your president lives in my house, your ministers and lawmakers all live in my house. All the important institutions of your country are located in my house, so you should learn to respect and love me. What would you do if I disappear one day with your president and all his cabinet?

I am a handsome man and no matter what the envious people say, the girls love me. The girls all over the country want to travel to meet me, Abuja. You can’t blame them. I am rich. All types of currencies and denominations are under my control and I am a free giver. At the end of every month, I share money to all parts of the country. Your governors come to me and line up with their bowls to receive their allocation. This is the money that you all use. So you can see how powerful and important I am.

There are certain things you do not know about me.

Do you know that if any man wants to marry any of my sisters, he has to come to my house and work on my farm for seven years, supplying food and grains to my house, so that the woman he wants to marry would be well fed? But nowadays I simply ask him to pay money in exchange for the seven years of labour.

My favorite food is wyizhe and a drink known as zhepwo. I know you all like Kilishi. Kilishi is my favorite beef snack. I love taking it with Fura da Nono or chilled zobo. I have restaurants here who serve all kinds of food both local and intercontinental.

My special fabric is Ajeside made from local cotton and woven traditionally.

I am a skillful man, I do pottery works, blacksmiths and sculpturing.
But you know these days money has made me lazy. Oil money has changed my life. I used to be a rural and undeveloped place until money came into my life and transformed me into a unique cosmopolitan city.

My roads are the best in the country. They are wide, smooth and traffic free. You can’t find potholes on them. I have skyscrapers and mansions all over me. When you meet me for the first time, especially at night, you would be mesmerized by what you see.

I am very peaceful in nature and that’s why many people prefer to stay with me. You may say that I am peaceful because I am the capital city with thousands of members of the armed forces guarding me. But I am for real, my nature abhors violence. I am calm, cool and collected and the people who come in from all over the world to meet me, love me for this.

I come alive at night, I go about spreading fun and laughter. The people who hang out with me always have a splendid time because I give them everything they want, be it food, drinks and any other type of fun. I don’t hold anything back.
I am an expensive man. This is one of the reasons why some Nigerians dislike me. You have to spend money on me for me to give you the high quality of life that you deserve.

I don’t want to boast about myself, I don’t want to blow my trumpet because I am Abuja-your capital city and I should be watching over all of you with a stern face. So let me stop here. Feel free to visit me anytime. I am Abuja and you should love me.


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